The Health Report: President Bush - Proof that Cloning is Dangerous. Really!

Today in DeadBrain's Health section, The White House and the WME finally admitted that they have been cloning President Bush for years. Of course, this is not news to us, because the report was accurate except for one small issue - Cheney NEVER shoots the clones! Never! He's just using it to make his whole "I shot Harry by mistake" story sound plausible.

When it started, the job always fell to one of the secretaries. First it was Chertoff, but he started enjoying it WAY too much, and he actually shot the only clone that was almost perfect. Plus, a few people under his employ mysteriously "disappeared" - - records don't show any transfers, out-of-state moves.....and Chertoff was always out duck hunting when one of his junior staff members vanished. So.....they figured out he was a little too trigger happy, and shooting the one halfway decent Bush clone was the last straw. So then it was Condi and Rummy, and as you can see, neither of them liked it. The Bush clone above is clearly making a gaffe, and both of them know he's a goner, but you can practically hear them,

"It's your turn!"
"No, it's not"
"Yes, it IS! I did it last time!"
"You did not"

God, like a couple of 5 year olds. So, finally it fell to the perfect candidate.

Dr. Eudaimonia.

He loves this part of the job, and we know for a fact that he likes to torture the clone before he kills it. When the time comes up to kill a clone, he makes sure he takes someone from down here with him. Keeps us good and terrified.

It's just the way things are around here.

We may be paralyzed with fear, but we are determined to escape.

I cannot stop thinking about Franny. I wish she would send a sign that she is okay. I look everywhere.......